My word of the year is an exercise that I have participated in for eight years. 2021 marks the ninth year that I have selected a word of the year. This word was inspired by a beautiful painting from my friend, A’Driane. It is called Drive. After we got the painting back from being framed, I realized how much I am drawn to the lines and the colors. The definition of drive is “determination and ambition to achieve something”. As I navigate my mid forties, I am starting to lean into the wisdom of my middle age. I know that I do not have all the answers. My anchor words are clarity, peace, and abundance. I use these anchor words to keep me grounded in my word of the year.
I am trying to focus more on my writing again. It has been a long time since I have written. As my daughters get older, I become even more fiercely protective of their privacy. I still have these words and ideas swirling around inside me. It is so interesting to watch these girls blossom into womanhood as I navigate middle age. I sense similarities and parallels in our journeys. We are learning how to navigate changing relationships with each other as I work to foster their independence. I have to find a balance between giving them space and holding them close. Our conversations are much more complex now about femininity, patriarchy, racism, puberty, childbirth, spiritual beliefs, the institution of the church, and my mental health advocacy.
As I reflect on this past year, I realized how much I had to fight to maintain my drive. As we move into year three of this pandemic, I had to continue to focus on my self-care – mental, physical, and emotional/spiritual. I have gone back to basics. I try to journal daily, move my body, get enough water, and get enough sleep. I needed to give myself pep talks and really listen to my body. We are experiencing global trauma and grief. It is okay to not be okay. It is okay to rest and regroup. The power of rest and being intentional with my energy and daily routines is what kept me going. Of course I continued to let my love of art in all forms inspire me and remind me that there is still love, light and beauty.