Loss of Innocence, part 2

I could not bear to write this a week ago even though my mind thought of her so often that day, hot tears prickling behind my eyes.  A classmate of mine from college was killed in the attack on the World Trade Tower.  I knew her as an acquaintance.  At first I could not place her name when my coworker was talking to me about the article in our local paper.  When I saw her picture on the computer screen smiling back at me, I gasped.  I worked in food service at my college, and it was a relatively small campus.  I did not know people’s last names.  I knew mostly faces and first names.  In my small college campus and in our classrooms, our Communications professors addressed us all by first names only.  It was a way of establishing trust, rapport and community.  Our entire graduating class was stunned.  How could one of our own be gone so soon?  It was unspeakable.  I realized immediately who her fiance was, and my heart ached.  He was and still is a great guy.  He was friendly to everyone in our class, always ready with a smile and a joke.  She was friendly and kind.   

I think her death touched me so much because our lives paralleled each other.  I was newly engaged barely a month at the time of 9/11; she was also newly engaged.  We were both Communication majors.  So I grieved for her, for her family and for her fiance, another classmate of mine.  I grieved for myself and yet another loss of my innocence.

I am choosing to remember that people can touch our lives and make a difference.  I choose to remember that our class banded together and created a scholarship in her name.  I choose to remember how we were all a little kinder to each other those days after 9/11.  I hope for a return to a kinder, gentler nation where we recognize that we are all human, flawed and imperfect. 

 

About tranquilamama

Juggling parenthood, housework and working outside the home in the corporate world with my wonderful husband. Mom to 2 beautiful girls. PPD and PPA survivor. The title of my blog is after a phrase that was repeated to me in Spain during my semester abroad in college. It roughly translates to relax and calm down. Trying to tame my inner perfectionist and just be a good enough mom.
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