My journey of health and fitness begins a bit differently than most. I did not gain a lot of weight while pregnant with Skeeter. Since I had gestational diabetes, I monitored everything I ate. I gained twenty-one pounds with her. I also lost all of the baby weight very quickly – too quickly. Nearly thirty pounds came off of my frame due to severe postpartum anxiety. I could not sit still, and I was nursing. I was burning more calories than I consumed.
Once I finally sought treatment for my postpartum depression and my postpartum anxiety, I began to regain my appetite. I started feeling mentally healthier, and I turned to food at times to cope with the stress. I still did not feel much energy to go out and exercise on a consistent basis. Coping with the morning routine and wrangling my two girls while tending to my own mental health took precedence. I also started to realize the need for mending my relationship with my husband. He had borne the brunt of my anger, my frustration, my tears, my anxiety, and my depression. He took care of the entire family tirelessly.
After a year in recovery, I was feeling so much better. I hated the way I looked. I did not feel comfortable or confident in my skin. I had evolved so much internally, but I felt like my exterior did not match all the changes that I had made on the interior. I had taken control of my own mental health, but in the process I had neglected my physical health. I had gained all of the weight back and then some. I was at my heaviest weight.
I began to work out again, and I joined the fitness center at my work. My endurance improved, and I felt stronger. I was not seeing the results I wanted. I realized that it was time to tackle my eating habits. I found a group of like-minded friends who helped keep me motivated at work and online. I finally found my tribe of health and fitness folks who remind me to stay on track and stay motivated. Exercise resets my day and my mood. It is my go to for self-care. I feel confident in how I look. I feel fantastic inside and out. I still struggle with self-doubt and anxiety, but I know how to talk back to those feelings. Sometimes all I need is a kick boxing workout to fight those demons that live in my head. I remind myself to keep my chin up and keep fighting.